Chocolate! Formula!

So exciting to hear! Old-fashioned baby milk is just so boring and un-processed and natural! Yes, the Los Angeles Times reports Mead Johnson, the maker of Enfamil, has introduced a product for toddlers who are graduating from breast milk or formula to new food, and it’s not just flavored (chocolate OR vanilla). It contains 19.7 grams of sugar per seven-ounce serving.

That’s more than four and a half teaspooons. Almost surely more than you, a significantly larger adult person, put in your coffee, and just slightly less than an equivalent amount of Coca-Cola contains.

Well, if we’re going to go this route as a culture—which is to say, habituating 1-year-olds to something that will give half of them diabetes—I say go all the way. Offer tricked-out flavors, the way Coffee-Mate does. Crème brûlée. Hazelnut. Give out free refills, from the dispenser stations at fast-food outlets and at Dunkin’ Donuts. And most important: Caffeinate it. Those future Starbucks drinkers aren’t just growing on trees.

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About Christopher

Christopher Bonanos is a senior editor at New York magazine, where he works on arts and urban-affairs coverage (and a few other things). He and his wife live smack in the middle of midtown Manhattan, where their son was born in March 2009. Both parents are very happy, and very tired.

One thought on “Chocolate! Formula!

  1. What a horrifying news blip to come across. Reminds me somewhat of last night’s Daily Show segment about “The American People.”

    Christ…

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