Sausage Fest, or How to Get Your Child to Play Nice With the Girls

June 7th, 2010  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  2 Comments


JP’s celebrated his final birthday party this weekend (for those of you keeping score at home, yes, that’s three; ah, the joys of joint custody).

A good time was had by all: there was frolicking, a bit of gamboling, some racing, gobs of skipping, hopping, and traipsing, and I must admit, a little bit of smacking, some crying, a single incident of kicking, and plenty of cupcakes. Typical fourth-birthday party, if you ask me.

One issue did arise (pun intended and forthcoming). A friend of mine who came to the party with his 5-year-old boy pointed out I hadn’t invited any girls to the celebration. Now, this wasn’t quite true, as Nathan would later arrive with his daughter, and another friend with a daughter had canceled last minute. But by and large, JP isn’t friends with little girls, although he does get along with them (my brother has two daughters and he is crazy about them).

I should point out (pun intended) that my friend didn’t just say there were no girls at the party. Actually what he said was this:

“Quite a sausage fest you got going on here.” A few other adults standing nearby laughed and agreed. They too thought it was quite a sausage fest.

Is this some new term that I haven’t yet heard? Does it only work on your iPad or something? I gotta say, it kinda freaked me out, and not just because I really like sausage. So to my friend, Gabe–who will actually be guest-blogging here next week–thank you for introducing a note of gay-locker-room humor into my little boy’s birthday celebration. You’re the best.

Also, any tips or reactions there as to boys only playing with boys? It seems to have happened naturally on JP’s part, but watching kids adapt to gender roles is always a fascinating and rather disturbing process. Discuss among yourselves.


  1. karen says:

    June 8th, 2010at 12:53 am(#)

    Sausages ( ) are much the conversation on … so not entirely a gayfest there. And where y’all say crotchfruit, these women are calling ’em what they are: crotch parasites ( ). Youch!


    What ever happened to “kids” being the rude version of children?

  2. Tim says:

    June 8th, 2010at 4:10 pm(#)

    I’d say as long as he has access to stereotypical “girl toys” you shouldn’t really have any issues there. I’d say my daughter plays more with stereotypical “girl toys”, but having a dump truck and fire truck makes her much more comfortable hanging out with the boys and doing whatever they’re doing.

    My daughter doesn’t have a lot of trouble interacting with either gender even though her friends for the first 3 years were overwhelmingly male (just by virtue of our friends having boys).

    She generally interacts better with boys who are about 6 months older, so you might try finding girls a bit younger than your son. I can definitely see the developmental differences in boys and girls.

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