Picnic Displeasure

yogi-picnic-cartoon

Word to the wise, all divorced fathers: do not come early (or in my case, on time) to your son’s school’s end-of-year picnic. If you do, and your ex-wife arrives late with your son, you will be forced to loiter awkwardly in the park for twenty minutes, feeling very much like a child molester. In future, arrange to come with your son or come late.

Free advice.

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About Theodore

Theodore Ross is an editor of Harper’s Magazine. His writing has appeared in Harper’s, Saveur, Tin House, the Mississippi Review, and (of course), the Vietnam News. He grew up in New York City by way of Gulfport, MS, and as a teen played the evil Nazi, Toht, in Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. He lives with his son, J.P. in Brooklyn, and is currently working on a book about Crypto-Jews.

2 thoughts on “Picnic Displeasure

  1. It seems like in NYC, you constantly cross paths with people you want to avoid and never run into those you wish you could see more often.

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