It’s World Cup time, folks. What, never heard of the World Cup? Well, it’s nothing less than the global phenomenon during which drunk Brits beat each other with lager bottles, where Germans visit brothels for sport, where everyone goes crazy for football, and–here comes the truth, folks–people in the United States neglect their work, wives, children, and responsibilities by pretending to care about a game they never played, don’t understand, find vaguely effeminate, and would completely ignore if it didn’t mean watching television at work.
That and we’re going to get our ass kicked by England! Woo hoo!
Vive le sport!