Curb Your Dog (Or Your Enthusiasm), But Not Your Baby

July 12th, 2010  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  6 Comments

Babies, too!

Babies, too!

Just came across this on the “neighborhood wiki” (can someone tell me what the fuck that is), Columbia Citizens:

Um, its Farmers Market day and I just saw a parent hold their child up next to a tree in Columbia Park while the child peed and POOPED. Then they picked it up in a plastic baggie. Although I am very grateful that they picked it up, the whole thing was very disturbing and I am left wondering if this is a new trend. Is this acceptable parent behavior?

Most responses to this were in the negative: No, your little one should not shit in public and then be looked after like your dog. Peeing, yes; Crapping, no. Hell, no, crap, no!

There was one commenter in favor:

Are you people serious? Relax. What is it with us Americans and our fear anything related to accepting our natural bodies. A kid took a crap (that was picked up). Who cares? Do I think adults should go around using the bathroom in the park? No. But if a kid had to go, he/she had to go. I think it’s great for the child. Get them comfortable with themselves. Or maybe we should continue to instill in them a fear of nudity! God will strike you down for exposing your birthday suit. If this was some sort of epidemic, then fine, be concerned. Otherwise, mind your own business. There is nothing better than seeing the park full of kids playing on Wed’s. Maybe our efforts should be focused on making everyday in the park like Wed’s farmer’s market. I can’t imagine a better way to build community than by coming together as families in the park. I’ll take kids running and screaming with joy any day. If once and a while one craps on the ground, I can live with that. Why did it have to be the puritans that settled the US originally? Really screwed it up for the rest of us.

If the Puritans prevent us from having someone’s kid take a dump at the farmer’s market, I’m in favor of reopening witch trials.


  1. Marty says:

    July 12th, 2010at 11:28 am(#)

    What next? Adults taking a dump at the farmer’s market because there isn’t a bathroom?

  2. Jack says:

    July 12th, 2010at 2:00 pm(#)

    There is a big movement to restore defecation in Nature. It is called The Natural Dump and it is simply beautiful. I fail to understand why people have a problem with it.

    Really the only significant issue is that pinecones are much tougher on your rear than Charmin, but the environment isn’t it.

  3. dadwagon says:

    July 12th, 2010at 2:05 pm(#)

    Jack–that very well may be–and really, the pine cone will do in a pinch (zing!), but this clearly wasn’t environmental, right? They picked up the poop in a bag which, i’m going out on a limb here, but I’m betting it was plastic. Oh–and while a bear, and even a person might shit in the woods, which I have done on various camping trips, shitting at the local farmer’s market is not wee (wee)(zing!) bit different. –Theodore.

  4. Elfkeeper says:

    July 12th, 2010at 7:12 pm(#)

    I think the kid’s parents should invest in some corks! Imagine allowing your child to defecate! The NERVE… Whats next Breathing?

  5. Joshua says:

    July 12th, 2010at 11:25 pm(#)

    Hmmmm… Solution = my little girl would have had to take a crap in her pants. I would then take her home/(nearest facility) to change her. Big kid emergency diapers.

  6. Marlena says:

    July 13th, 2010at 9:39 am(#)

    A nice follow-up to your earlier post about other countries potty-training their kids starting at 6 months. One of my favorite stories from a well-traveled friend is on her trips to China and India, if a kids is on a bus and needs to go to the bathroom, people take turns passing the kid around until there’s a window. They then dangle said kid’s rear out the moving vehicle until the business is done, then kid is passed back to their family. I love the image of a busload of people coming together to help a kid take a pee or dump. There’s community for you – not worrying about actually “seeing” a child get their jean diapers changed…

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