The Beautiful Game

Dutch football at its best

Dutch footballer forgetting what sport he plays

Now that Spain has won and the Spanish are trying to figure out how they can possibly drink more over the next week than they do on normal weeks, I will have to stop thinking about soccer for another four years.

But before I do, a word about soccer for 4-year-olds. Dalia has also wrapped up her brief soccer experience, two weeks at an indoor kiddie place called Super Soccer Stars (I know, annoying name, right?) in our neighborhood. And while she never quite learned in her time there to sit on the couch, drink beer, and yell at the stupid fucking refs for 90 minutes the way I can, I think she likes the sport. I can tell this because she brings it home with her–sets up pillow-goalposts in the living room and instructs her little brother to kick the little plastic Wall-E through them.

My wife got to see her on the small Astroturf pitch at Super Soccer Stars, and gave a mixed report. Half the time Dalia seemed to enjoy herself, and she understood the aims of the game pretty well throughout. The other half of the time she entered into a mode she’s been known to slip into from time to time, a sort of active self-pity. According to eyewitness accounts, she would keep running, but her arms would go limp and she would start sobbing “this is so hard, this is so hard,” while chasing after the ball. Which, based on what I saw Sunday, is a style of play that would qualify her for the Dutch national team.

To really emulate the Dutch team, though, she might have to combine soccer with her other extracurricular.

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About Nathan

Nathan Thornburgh is a contributing writer and former senior editor at TIME Magazine who has also written for the New York Times, newyorker.com and, of course, the Phnom Penh Post. He suspects that he is messing up his kids, but just isn’t sure exactly how.

4 thoughts on “The Beautiful Game

  1. One more thing to qualify for the Dutch team: beat the shit out of your opponents at every possible opportunity and then cry about how the refereeing screwed you out of winning the Cup.

  2. Yup, that’s the Dutch way. And I’m speak as a Dutch-American of sorts. For once I’m thinking maybe New Amsterdam isn’t as rough and thuggish as Old Amsterdam…

  3. Hopefully, she’s playing a small-sided (3 on 3 no goalies) for only about 10 minutes a half. If not, you’ve got her in the wrong program. The class we used had soccer-like games but held off on actual games until 4 or 5 years old. As always, the commenters are here for you to tell you what you’re doing wrong.

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