August 30th, 2010  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  2 Comments

the male child in its environment

the male child in its environment

I took JP for a play date yesterday at the house of a friend who has three young boys. “Play” consisted largely of wrestling, and I don’t mean the cute, squirming, but ultimately not very violent kind of wrestling. This was the real deal, folks, with tactics that included but were by no means limited to: punching, kicking, choking, scratching, spitting, licking, noogieing, eye-gouging, and yes, a bit of hugging (whenever I told them to knock it off). They weren’t fighting per se, although when I asked them just what did they think we were doing hammering away at each other like that, JP answered, “We’re fighting!” with a huge grin on his face.

None of this is a big deal, really. The kids weren’t being too violent, no blood was drawn, and it wasn’t like the dads were pitting them against each other. This was how they wanted to play (until we made s’mores and turned on Star Wars, at which peace descended from above). They were, and I hate to say it because it sounds so awful, just being boys.

Which makes the fact that my upcoming child is a girl that much sweeter. I have no preference in terms of gender: wasn’t dying for a boy the first time around, wasn’t hoping not to have one this time. But when I look at the female children in the playground, do you know what I see: quieter, better behaved, more articulate, cleaner little people. In short: human beings. Humans!

Meanwhile, the boys remain beasts.


  1. Tim says:

    August 30th, 2010at 11:25 am(#)

    I got one of those girls. The other is the one you’ll find teetering precariously on top of a picnic table, mouth covered with dirt, throw sand in the air. So good luck!

  2. Holmes says:

    August 30th, 2010at 4:00 pm(#)

    Ours is a two boy household. Individually, they’re different as can be, but they both love a good scuffle.

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