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God Tries to Smite Brooklyn

September 17th, 2010  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  5 Comments

Image credit: twitpic.com AvroMeir

Image credit: twitpic.com AvroMeir

We have our share of boro battles here on DadWagon: half of us live in Brooklyn, half in Manhattan. I live on the real island, but have my share of Brooklyn envy (easy parking! Polish beer!) Theodore claims to be a proud Brooklynite, but I did notice that his recent baby shower was in Manhattan proper.

I would like to point out that it appears that God has weighed in on these disputes. Yesterday evening all of New York City got whumped by a brief, intense torment. Tornado warnings on Staten Island, pelting rain and whipping winds where I was near Harlem.

But it was Brooklyn that bore the worst. The scaffolding at Grand Army plaza blew into the subway entrance, residents talked about trash cans and tree limbs spinning in wild circles 50 feet above the ground (“a poltergeist”, said one). And Park Slope, with all its precious leafy arbors, seemed to be full of downed trees that uprooted sidewalks and crushed SUVs (sadly, in neighboring Queens, someone was actually killed by a falling branch, something that normally only happens in Central Park).

One redeeming quality about Brooklyn is that many great photographers seem to hang out there. My TIME colleague Anthony Suau just posted a nice slideshow of his pictures of the storm (thanks MaryAnne for the link).

Pretty pictures aside, though, I want to know what displeasure Brooklyn has brought our vengeful God. I believe that in Williamsburg many people are still trying to do right by Baal Shem Tov. And few would accuse the Caribbean diaspora in Bed-Stuy of forsaking their Creator. So I’m going to ask Theodore and Matt (though he’s traveling) to look inside. What did you do? What did you say? God is always watching, and he tried to kill you and your families last night. Figure out why, before it’s too late.


Responses

  1. Jason says:

    September 17th, 2010at 10:31 am(#)

    I told you guys you shoulda let Pat Robertson do a guest post.

  2. Nathan says:

    September 17th, 2010at 10:43 am(#)

    Damn. We were wrong not to listen to you. But when Satan is sitting on one shoulder whispering in your ear, and PetCobra is sitting on the other, it can be confusing.

  3. Tony Karon says:

    September 17th, 2010at 2:47 pm(#)

    “Smite” is a little strong, Nate: I think that was a kind of brushback, a reminder to all those Baal Shem Tov chaps to get their “kaparot” chicken-choking game on: http://www.haaretz.com/news/features/ultra-orthodox-jews-prepare-for-yom-kippur-with-kaparot-ritual-1.314164

  4. dadwagon says:

    September 17th, 2010at 3:07 pm(#)

    @Tony That’s great. I love the idea of passing your sins onto a chicken. Sorta like an STD.

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