A Week on the Wagon: Matt was kidnapped edition

Matt, "on assignment" in Montreal

I don’t mean to question the work habits of DadWagon co-founder and super-huge-bigshot-famous-journalist Matt, and I am impressed that he’s been able to post this week while out of the country (check out his true feelings about Nathan, procreation, and the sound of his voice), but still we always worry when he’s away.

It’s good to keep track of all the DadWagoneers as they progress through a week. Nathan, while in the city, I believe, hasn’t been his typical productive, sarcastic, brilliant self. True, he doesn’t much like Matt, and yes, he’s continued to pimp this whole Russian thing, and admittedly he’s exposed himself as both anti-arab and anti-immigrant, but where’s the verve? Where’s the elan? We’ve come to expect more here at DadWagon, Nathan, that’s all.

And me? Well, as the least accomplished and best-looking member of DadWagon, I’ve basically just continued treading water: ridiculing both Matt and Nathan (please see: “Matt and Nathan are disgusting, perverted donkeys”), poking fun at the PR industry, and defending my right to sexual profligacy. Ho hum.

Thus, on behalf of the entire DadWagon team, including staff, interns, press reps, sales staff, office monkeys, pets, children, and spouses, I apologize. Next week Matt will be funnier.

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About Theodore

Theodore Ross is an editor of Harper’s Magazine. His writing has appeared in Harper’s, Saveur, Tin House, the Mississippi Review, and (of course), the Vietnam News. He grew up in New York City by way of Gulfport, MS, and as a teen played the evil Nazi, Toht, in Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. He lives with his son, J.P. in Brooklyn, and is currently working on a book about Crypto-Jews.

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