The Entire World Is Awful


And not just because I’m going to meet with my accountant today. No, there really is crappy stuff out in the world, and not all of it earthquake-related, either (BTW–to those friends and relatives who sent messages and phone calls of concern–Tomoko’s family is fine, they were in a different part of Japan, but thanks).

Even in our little parenting corner of the world, burdened with entitlement, overwhelmed with minor and irrelevant anxieties, comically and perhaps cosmically fraught with bad choices, bad decisions, and bad ju-ju–some shit is still just really bad.

Case in point: don’t sue the pre-school for harming your 4-year-old’s chances of getting into an Ivy League School:

Impressed by the school’s pledge to ready its young students for the ERB – a test used for admission at top private elementary schools – Imprescia enrolled her daughter at York in 2009.

A month into this school year, she transferred the child out of the upper East Side center because she had been lumped in with 2-year-olds.

“Indeed, the school proved not to be a school at all, but just one big playroom,” the suit says.

Imprescia’s court papers suggest the school may have damaged Lucia’s chances of getting into a top college, citing an article that identifies preschools as the first step to “the Ivy League.”

Don’t! It’s wrong! It’s stupid! But if you do don’t let your lawyer anything like this:

“Lucia Imprescia, for the record, will get into an Ivy League school, York Avenue Preschool notwithstanding,” said Paulose, of Koehler & Isaacs.

Remember, karma’s a bitch. Don’t agree? Read this, from McSweeney’s, which lays out, rather intelligently, I think, the case against karma and her machinations.

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About Theodore

Theodore Ross is an editor of Harper’s Magazine. His writing has appeared in Harper’s, Saveur, Tin House, the Mississippi Review, and (of course), the Vietnam News. He grew up in New York City by way of Gulfport, MS, and as a teen played the evil Nazi, Toht, in Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation. He lives with his son, J.P. in Brooklyn, and is currently working on a book about Crypto-Jews.

2 thoughts on “The Entire World Is Awful

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