• Dadwagon on Facebook
  • Dadwagon on Twitter
  • Dadwagon RSS feed

Men My Wife Likes Who Are Not Me

May 26th, 2011  |  by  |  Published in Polls  |  3 Comments

I am not, by nature, a jealous type. Nor am I the kind of idealistic romantic who imagines his partner could, and should, never fantasize about another person. But still, I take note whenever Jean, my wife, says she finds someone attractive. These occasions are pretty rare, but I track them, and solely to embarrass her (or is it me I’m embarrassing?), I figured I’d present you with them, then let you decide who she should leave me for.

Charlie Day: If you’ve ever watched It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, you know Charlie—possibly the single most hilarious character on TV today. Impoverished and illiterate, with a warped sensibility, a penchant for skintight green bodysuits and an autodidactic facility with the piano, Charlie is often the butt of his Always Sunny pals—forced to do janitorial work, and to live with the even more slovenly Danny DeVito—until he gets his revenge. He’s also hopelessly in love with the Waitress, who despises him (although the actress who plays her is actually his wife).

Aziz Ansari: Currently best known as Tom Haverford, a massively underachieving and somewhat solipsistic character on Parks & Recreation, Ansari won (sort of) Jean’s heart with a monologue about the nicknames he gives to food and food-related items, culminating in the line “I call forks… food rakes.” Dude is actually really funny:

Robert Reid: I’m including my old friend Robert Reid here mostly because I feel like I need a third option, but also because a long, long time ago I showed Jean a photo of Robert in Vietnam in 1997, and she said she thought he was cute. (She was not as impressed after she met him in person; sorry, dude!) Strangely enough, Robert’s own sense of humor is kind of line with these other guys, so maybe that means something. And maybe it says something about what kind of hilarious weirdo I am, too (in reality, if not in the blogosphere). Anyway, here’s some video of him:

So, now that you’ve met my rivals, let’s decide who Jean should leave me for (not that she’s going to leave me (I hope)):


  1. Marlena says:

    May 27th, 2011at 10:44 am(#)

    My husband says I like befuddled men. Apparently, if Jemaine Clement comes on screen, I turn into a puddle of smiling, goofy girlidom. Something about goofy dudes; it’s like the hot chick men lust after, but don’t want to marry.

  2. Matt says:

    May 27th, 2011at 7:18 pm(#)

    I guess I should feel glad Jemaine wasn’t on this list.

  3. Jean says:

    June 1st, 2011at 10:19 pm(#)

    I like Bradley Cooper.

Leave a Response


Recent Comments

  • Dee: As one of the impressed moms there last night, and also because my kid ate 3 bowls of that bolognese, thanks for...
  • Drew Wallner via Facebook: I’m totally making this when we get back from holiday travel, I even just got a...
  • Matt: Whoops! Just put that back in. The recipe editor has been fired.
  • Ed Lilly: Looks great – thanks for posting! One question – you did not specify putting the meat back into...
  • Maks: I’m against baby yoga for sure, but want to say something regarding that author is a little wild about...

DadWagon Reads!



The Right Way to Swear in Front of Your Kids


Context, context, context.

Sep 19th 2:33pm • No Comments

I don't care. EAT IT ANYWAY, KID!

‘Five Second Rule’ for Food on Floor Is Untrue, Study Finds


Researchers concluded that no matter how fast you pick up food that falls on the floor, you will pick up bacteria with it.

Sep 19th 11:38am • No Comments


Why Danish Parents Like to Talk About Death


It's because it makes for happier kids, says new book.

Aug 11th 8:19am • No Comments

Not sure whether to be proud or pissed we didn't make this list.

The Awl

The definitive ranking of dads.

Aug 3rd 5:39pm • No Comments