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Things My Dad Didn’t Tell Me, But That I’ll Tell My Kids: Perspiration Edition

June 2nd, 2011  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  2 Comments

Antiperspirant doesn’t work. Man, when I think of all about how many pit-stained white shirts I’ve had to dispose of, I regret ever having believed that little word “antiperspirant” printed on the labels of all those canisters of Degree and Right Guard and whatever. Shit just doesn’t work; for decades I put it on, and still I sweated. Had I only known!

Now it’s just deodorant, and who knows if that’s just a lie, too.

Anyway, I don’t know if this is going to matter to Sasha—she may have that reduced-perspiration Asian gene—but I’ll let her know, just to be safe.


  1. JFM says:

    June 2nd, 2011at 10:41 am(#)

    Antiperspirant stains shirts, independently of whether you sweat in them.

  2. Matt says:

    June 2nd, 2011at 10:49 am(#)

    Awesome: It stains your shirts, and it doesn’t work anyway. Why does it exist?

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