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Entries from September 2012

How to Name Your Goddamn Kid

September 11th, 2012 by Matt | 10 Comments

Three months ago, the editor of a “luxury magazine” emailed to ask if I could, very very quickly, write up an article on the challenges of naming your baby. Sure, I said, and I wrote it up that day. Today, however, I found out that, for mysterious reasons, it didn’t run. Oh well. This happens. […]

‘Can You Blog About That? Like, What the Heck?!?’

September 10th, 2012 by Matt | 2 Comments

Here’s a quickie: After just two days of public school, we’re discovering that all kinds of school activities are scheduled at ridiculous times, like the New Parent Orientation on Monday from 9 am to 10 am in the cafeteria. How can anyone with a job possibly expect to attend that kind of thing? I mean, […]

Welcome to Pre-K: I Am Your Disease Vector

September 5th, 2012 by Matt | 3 Comments

A little over a week ago, I was taking Sasha home from day care when we stopped to play in our local playground. After a few minutes of climbing around, however, she started complaining that she was cold, and that her head hurt. Since it was 80 degrees out, I figured something was wrong, and […]

Brood, Thy Name is Ross

September 4th, 2012 by Theodore | 3 Comments

So, Saturday, August 26th, after many hours of labor, my wife, Tomoko gave birth to our second child, and my third. Her name is Mena Masako Ross, a name I kinda like, even if the first one was suggested to us by a semi-retired Internet guy on yoga retreat vacation in Mexico, and if only […]

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DadWagon Reads!


Phew! I think this means we no longer have to pay such close attention to our kids, right?

The astonishing amount of data being collected about your children


Remember that ominous threat from your childhood, 'This will go down on your permanent record?' Well, your children's permanent record is a whole lot bigger today and it may be permanent. Information about your children's behavior and nearly everything else that a school or state agency knows about…

Nov 13th 7:21pm • No Comments

OMG! What crazy-ass people! This is nuts! Insane!

(I'm just saying that to get your attention: This is a surprisingly mature discussion, particularly for Reddit. So, uh, read it.)

[First time having sex] One Dad's View • /r/sex


I am a father of a boy(13) and a girl(15). I told them that it was alright for them to be sexually active as soon as they were "ready". I then...

Nov 13th 2:58pm • No Comments

We've known this for years.

Study Finds Every Style Of Parenting Produces Disturbed, Miserable Adults


SANTA ROSA, CA—A study released by the California Parenting Institute Tuesday shows that every style of parenting inevitably causes children to grow into profoundly unhappy adults.

Nov 10th 11:19am • No Comments

Don't have cash? We'll do it for free. Hell, we'll do it whether you want us to or not.

This creepy 65-year-old clown will terrify your misbehaving kid for cash


His name is Wrinkles and he's booked for months in advance

Nov 4th 7:06am • No Comments