Welcome to Pre-K: I Am Your Disease Vector

A little over a week ago, I was taking Sasha home from day care when we stopped to play in our local playground. After a few minutes of climbing around, however, she started complaining that she was cold, and that her head hurt. Since it was 80 degrees out, I figured something was wrong, and sure enough, she had a fever. I gave her some ibuprofen, and in a day or so her fever broke and she got better.

Two days ago, while shopping with Sasha and Jean, I suddenly began to feel achy all over—from the back of my neck to the soles of my feet. Yup, I had the same thing, and after a sweaty, shivery night last night, I’m finally getting better.

These things happen, of course, but it’s our luck that they’re happening right before the beginning of the new school year. Tomorrow Sasha has her very first day of city Pre-K—yay, universal Pre-K!—and she’ll both be exposing kids to her germs and getting exposed herself. I expect her to come down with something new and annoying early next week. Yay, universal Pre-K.

But what’s even more awesome is that yesterday Sasha had two friends over to play—friends who this very week are starting to go to new preschools (two of the best-known in Brooklyn, as it happens) and who, in all likelihood, will come down with the fever I just got over and spread it around to their new classmates.

Do I feel guilty about this? Maybe a little. I mean, it’s not like it’s whooping cough or the measles. And Sasha, who gave me this bug, surely got it from some other kid at her old school, so maybe it’s that kid’s parents who should feel guilty. All I’m saying is, if you’re looking for Patient Zero, she’s wearing a pink dress and pretending to fly around on a broomstick behind me as I type this.

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About Matt

Matt Gross writes about travel and food for the New York Times, Saveur, Gourmet, and Afar, where he is a Contributing Writer. When he’s not on the road, he’s with his wife, Jean, and daughter, Sasha, in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn.

3 thoughts on “Welcome to Pre-K: I Am Your Disease Vector

  1. The indulgent/precious parenting vibe of thinking that your child is so special that it is okay for them to annoy/disturb/infect others is really just too much. As a dad of nine year old twins, I must say that I’m tired of being tired of watching indulgent parenting.

    Newsflash: your kid is like any other. They are not special. So keep them home when they are sick so the rest of us don’t get sick. And while you’re at it, if your child decides to belt out that song you think is so cute in a crowded restaurant, remove him/her ASAP. We don’t think it’s adorable, just annoying. (This also applies for kids who scream “they are just showing their individuality,” tantrum “I let it play out so they can learn a lesson,” or kick the back of my airplane seat “I tried to tell them to stop, but they won’t listen.”)

    Not saying you ascribe to any of these philosophies, Matt, but c’mon! — keep your annoying/sick/average child away from mine!

  2. Uh, not sure where you got the idea I’m bringing my sick kid to school, but I don’t/wouldn’t. The kids came over to play yesterday while I was out and before my wife realized how sick I was. Had we known, we would have let them over anyway, but kept them from licking my toothbrush and rubbing my used tissues all over their faces.

  3. matt,

    I thought you understood I was speaking in “general” terms and said: “Not saying you ascribe to these philosphies” — I was making a larger point about what I call “Precious Parenting” where God has granted a special gift to certain parents of a child who needs to be encouraged to be themselves, even if it means destroying everyone around them’s good time/health/etc.

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