• Dadwagon on Facebook
  • Dadwagon on Twitter
  • Dadwagon RSS feed

More Death Talk

February 26th, 2010  |  by  |  Published in Uncategorized  |  2 Comments

deathbylove1Nathan’s somewhat mournful post from earlier today (Coors really bums me out), about work and snow and parenting, reminded me of one of my few straightforwardly sincere posts on death (most of my thoughts on slipping the mortal coil are outrageously funny).

As I wrote earlier, one of the teachers in JP’s preschool passed away and the school had made the policy decision not to tell the children anything about it.

Because this is New York and the 21st century, a flurry of parent-email-list hand-wringing ensued. (I hereby decree that any future email sent to me that runs longer than two paragraphs be required to involve my winning the lottery, free Mets World Series tickets — in 2040 — or dirty pictures.) Most of it was critical of the school’s decision; child-psychology theories were advanced; poignant details about earlier death conversations were related in memoiristic detail; and generally the yadda-yadda-yadda flowed.

Then the kids started talking. Now, JP hasn’t breathed a word and, in fact, hasn’t yet seemed to notice that his teacher is gone, which is sad but kind of a relief, as I wasn’t all that keen on explaining the whole meaning-of-life thing to him just yet. But apparently, if the next round of tiresome emails was to be believed, some children got wind of it, questioned the parents, concepts were explained, and a few tears were shed.

Anyway, bottom line is now the school wants to tell the kids. They are bringing in a child psychologist to discuss it, which means God knows what, other than that now I will likely have to reckon with it, which isn’t so bad but still kind of sucks. I’m still not sure what’s better: to explain a difficult concept like this in the context of someone he wasn’t attached to, when the stakes or low, or when someone he truly cares about passes away. No easy answers.


  1. JJ Daddy-O says:

    February 26th, 2010at 5:40 pm(#)

    Just wait until your 8 year old sees a Klan robe for sale in an antique shop. Try explaining THAT shit…

  2. Theodore says:

    February 26th, 2010at 6:25 pm(#)

    JJ–that one I’m ready for. We Jews know all about explaining why people don’t like us. Genetic.

Leave a Response



Recent Comments

  • Len: Absolutely! Unequivocally! Especially if they’re only in preschool. What they learn and experience on a...
  • Nathan: Yes, suspiciously sanitary. Of course, my babies just emit a faint, pleasing lemony odor. So maybe I’m...
  • Joe: Now I don’t know anything about babies, except that one is going to come out of my wife soon, but from...
  • Brenda: Wow, is it really MNG? Seriously excited!
  • SCOTTSTEV: My goodness. I read your takedown of Armin Brott. Judging from the preppy shirt on the cover, I was...

DadWagon Reads!

What Almost Made Me Cry Today:

ทรูมูฟ เอช " การให้ คือการสื่อสารที่ดีที่สุด " Giving ทรูมูฟ เอช เชื่อเสมอว่า "การให้ คือการสื่อสารที่ดีที่สุด" โดยเราสื่อสารผ่านภาพยนตร์โฆษณาทางโทรทัศน์ เรื่องราวในภาพยนตร์โฆษณาเรื่องนี้ สะท้อนแนวคิดของแบรนด์ ท...

Sep 13th, 2013 4:43pm • Comment

How to stop toddlers from crying—guaranteed!

How to Stop her Crying

Aug 23rd, 2013 3:08pm • No Comments

Little Children, Big Challenges: Incarceration - Sesame Workshop
Welcome to Sesame Street’s press room for our newest resiliency initiative Little Children, Big ...

Jun 12th, 2013 12:42pm • No Comments

This is what it's like!

Convos With My 2 Year Old - EPISODE 1 Actual conversations with my 2 year old daughter, as re-enacted by me and another full grown man - Episode 1. Produced by Warmland Films www.warmlandfilms.co...

May 24th, 2013 11:40am • No Comments