From my friend Summer (via McSweeney‘s) comes a round-up of Russian literary classics redone for small children:

Crime and Punishment

Run your hand over Raskolnikov’s scratchy face. He is feverish and pale. Raskolnikov is a murderer. Can the ends ever justify the means?

Master and Margarita

Pet Behemoth’s soft black fur. Behemoth is a giant cat who walks, talks, and discharges firearms. His owner is Satan.

If these books existed, I would definitely get them for Sasha. They just better have good illustrations! Hey, Nathan, while you’re in Moscow, can you check around for what Russian kidlit is really like?